Building your confidence (to date successfully)
We humans are strange. We long for something good to happen to us, and when it does we think we don't deserve it and sabotage ourselves. This is true in many sectors, dating being one of them. You might think that teenagers are the only ones with confidence and self-esteem issues, but unfortunately this is hardly the case. Men and women of every color around the world are suffering from low self esteem that affects their lives in many ways. Following you can find ways to boost your confidence and realize that you are the best catch there is out there!
Eat healthy, Work out
If you want to date black men, who have a reputation of being a lot into fitness, you might be hesitant because you feel your body is not good enough. First of all, all bodies have their own beauty. But if we could convince you about it just like that, you wouldn't have self-esteem issues. So do something proactive, in order to feel better about yourself. Start eating a healthy diet and start exercising. You don't have to become a champion and you don't need to starve. Just replacing junk food with homemade meals and running or doing yoga for half an hour every day will help you feel much better. Your energy levels will rise and your body will become toned. When you feel good about yourself, you radiate positivity and confidence and there is nothing more attractive than that.
If you feel that you don't stand out of the crowd and you are just an average guy, suit up for a change. Your clothes don't even have to be expensive. Clothes that are clean and ironed and fit you well will boost your confidence in seconds. If you want to date white women, you need to impress yourself first, in order to impress them next.
Fix your posture
If you have always been that girl with the big breast is school or that boy that was taller than everyone, you might have a bad habit of slouching that stuck with you. Slouching makes you look like you are trying to hide all the time. A proud posture -head up, shoulders rolled back, spine straight- helps you feel better about your self. You are an amazing human being, no need to hide!
If you have a low self esteem, it is easy to keep silent throughout a date, in fear of saying something stupid. Have you ever though though that sometimes this makes you look boring and dull instead of mysterious? Sure white women and black men dating can appreciate a good listener, but they want to be fascinated by their date as well. So if you want a second date to take place, you need to speak up! You can start by practicing in non-date environment. Try to talk more and express your opinion when you are out with your friends or at family gatherings. If you disagree with someone, explain your arguments. If you have a proposal of where to go that night out with your friends, don't keep it to yourself! Your opinion is as valuable as anyone else's and people want to hear it.
Instead of complaining and being miserable all the time about the things that go wrong in your life, try to be positive. No one likes to be around people who complain all the time. Yes, you might not get what you want all the time, but nobody does really. So try and break this circle of negativity by being grateful about the things that you do have and make your life better. Maybe you didn't get that rise you expected at work, but you do have an amazing best friend. Maybe you did not get all A's at school, but you were pretty good at sports. See? You are not a loser! Good things happen to you and you deserve them. Remember that a loser attitude won't get you anywhere. Especially not in your date's bed. Being grateful is much sexier.
The "I am good at..." list
Even the most confident people have a little stress, when they go on a date. This is why a mental “I am good at...” list is very useful. When you find yourself stressing out about if your date likes you, repeat in your head all the things that are great about you. Here is an example “I good at telling great stories. I am good at organizing travels. I am good at cooking. I am good at fixing cars. I am good at comforting my friends. I am good at...”. This reminds you that you are worth a great date and a great partner. If you feel that your date is doing you a favor for going out with you, this will show in your face. And no one likes to go out with someone who feels sorry for themselves.
Of course, building your self esteem is a process that can take time. It won't happen overnight and for some people it takes more practice than for others. But it is worth the effort as it will make your life easier not only when it comes to dating, but also in your work and family environment as well.